UNLUCKY MANSION

I think this entire summer I've been chasing some kind of stimulation to like..distract me from the agonies so it's really no surprise that I returned to this series after 6-7 years. This is a rambling mess of a review that honestly just feels like I'm rehashing things more than anything, but it's fitting for the series I suppose ! The brain dump ensues...

a synopsis

All For the Game is a trilogy about a made up sport called exy which is like lacrosse if it were more violent? Our main character Neil Josten has been in hiding and on the run from his mafia father for about eight years, but when he gets an offer to play for Palmetto State University, he accepts against all good reason. Not only does he risk his cover being blown by the publicity of being in a controversial class I exy team, but he has to contend with his teammates Kevin Day, a celebrity in the world of exy who caused a stir when he transferred to the team and also someone from Neil's past, and Andrew Minyard, a dangerous and difficult-to-read goalkeeper who already has suspicions.

There's more to it that can succinctly be said. The Palmetto State Foxes are talented, but known for their dysfunction as a team due to each of them being recruited from hard situations. Neil thinks his main risk was Kevin recognizing who he really was only to find out that Kevin's previous team, the Edgar Allen Ravens, also has ties to the mafia via the Moriyama family...who have worked with his father before. And there's more complications when the Ravens start targeting (punishing) Kevin and the rest of the team a little too directly...

aftg is fun...

I wouldn't consider All For the Game to particularly good. I find myself cringing when I think about how I even recommended the series to my entire english class in a short talk at 14, so I wouldn't even necessarily recommend the series either. When all is said and done it's kind of an unserious, unrealistic sports anime-esque mafia story that does a little too much and reads a little fanfic-y, but I can't say I don't respect it? It's kinda fun as fucking hell. Put simply, it's really about the characters and the dynamics between them more than anything else.

Sometimes it's important to have a cast that have real beef with each other (often stemming from their personal grievances with life) and they get on each others nerves and say out of pocket shit and just swing fists. It's not even character conflict born out of stupidity. You could argue a good portion of the cast are kind of just not really good people and it's not like they're bringing the best out of the characters you could say do have a moral compass. Sometimes the jibes are for no reason other than this character just does not like that character. A character can understand where another is coming from and a fight can still fight just on the grounds that they are still just so goddamn annoying. I find it entertaining . This is still a simplification of the team dynamics though. Like the fighting is super entertaining. We need the tension, but there's still championships to win so the team still needs to work.

The team is very roughly split into the upperclassmen and Andrew's lot/the "monsters" (consisting of himself, his twin brother, his cousin and Kevin) with Neil being able to get along with both groups. A lot of the fun in the beginning is figuring out these dynamics amidst characters rubbing each other the wrong way. The upperclassmen are relatively "normal" compared to Andrew's lot, but they're each quite pleasant on their own. Seeing their limits being tested and their lack of understanding with how Andrew's lot operates is fun. The support they afford Neil is wholesome and contrasts well against the type of support the monsters offers him. Andrew's lot...are at once crossed boundaries, promises, fucked up family ties, real love, isolationism, possessiveness, closed and open secrets, enabling the worst in each other, but also wanting better for each other and unfailingly standing by each other's side. They stand opposite to the upperclassmen, but that's not even quite right either.

It's hard to speak more on this without getting into the Kevin-Neil-Andrew-isms. Where do I even start fr...

Most of the other characters including Neil himself find Andrew hard to parse. He's skilled at exy, but doesn't apply himself or seem to care, is quick to violence and appears to cross other people's lines all the time (some of his earliest scenes are him going through Neil's stuff and then drugging him up). He's cynical, harsh and apathetic and you have no idea what his deal his, but it's fascinating finding out. I loveee that to be a part of Andrew's lot isn't about being a part of Andrew's family or even be someone he likes. It's about who he's willing to protect and it speaks to a core of his character: that he cares? so, so much? He's someone who's faced some of the worst traumas a person can face, but there's still people worth saving and protecting. It's evidence that he isn't made of 100% concentrated apathy. He harbors a hope for this world, but because he refuses to confront and commit to it, he can only come across as contradicting and inconsistent.

A bit on Kevin and Andrew: The reveal about what Kevin and Andrew's deal is one of my favorite moments. Andrew acts like Kevin's guard dog, but almost constantly disregards Kevin's push for everyone to be the best they can be at exy...but then you learn that in return for Andrew's protection, Kevin simply promises to make a great exy player out of him. This is a deal Andrew accepts. Despite everything. Andrew is not someone who wants to die or throw his life away!! It's the phrasing that really gets me too..."I was the first person who ever looked at Andrew and told him he was worth something. When he comes off these drugs and has nothing else to hold him up I will give him something to build his life around." Like...okay Kevin!!!! This is such a good Kevin scene too because for as much of an exy-brained idiot as he is, he understands that Andrew wants something more out of life too, but is refusing himself that.

A lot of the more crude parts of Andrew's behavior also makes a lot of sense in terms of the deals/promises/boundaries he sets and the consequences that come about when people can't recognize or respect them. Most people aren't willing to put in the effort to understand that. I like it. It makes sense considering Andrew's trauma. It's a good basis for a character that leaves ample room for conflict, whether that's between the upperclassmen or between the monsters themselves. While Andrew's brother and cousin, Aaron and Nicky, have a better grasp of how Andrew works, they don't fundamentally understand him the way Neil (and Kevin, but far less so) does. Understandably so! They're a lot closer to the heart of events with regards to Andrew's trauma and that can be obfuscating. I enjoy that they aren't totally satisfied with the team dynamics either, but they're kind of trapped in it and the deals they made and the circumstances they experienced years ago. So when the upperclassmen feel the need to speak on them when they don't know anything, of course things don't work out. The dynamic between the Foxes is just. really fun to me!!

If we're talking character relationships I'd be remiss not to cover the Neil-Andrew and Neil-Kevin-isms as well.

Neil's character is in a position where he's most able to/has the most reason to chip at Andrew's character and better understand him. It's a lot of give and take (imparting further tension because the total truth of Neil's identity isn't fully known). At the same time, Neil sharing smaller truths about himself lets him feel known, making any parting between him and the team that much more difficult. It's really no wonder the primary romance of this series is between Neil and Andrew. It pushes both of their characters forward.

I believe the first time I read this series I wasn't too crazy about Kevin which is funny because he was definitely one of my favorites this time around. Andrew's important, don't get me wrong, and I do find him interesting, but Kevin is so much closer to the heart of the plot in a way that makes him feel like a main character but astoundingly not because...there's already a main character and his name is Neil. In the large scheme of things, Neil IS farther from the core conflict and by virtue of the story being told from his perspective, so are we. It makes him, Kevin and the relationship between them better for it. On reread, the stakes of Neil's mafia father is a bit hard to take seriously, but it quickly shifts as the story unfolds, becoming less about that and more about whether he can not be Nothing in a life previously dominated by hardly being a person at all. I found myself really caring about Neil's continuous grief over his mother (someone who he spent most of his life with, simply another body unquestionably working to survive alongside him, someone he disliked intensely for so long, someone he still holds so closely after death, someone who died as Nothing before him etc etc) and his hunger for exy. The foundation of this story is in Neil's doomed, selfish attempt at one single indulgence and like,,,it got me man!! sorry! Kevin is amusing because he's the press's and fans' darling, but he is SUCH a bitch about exy. Kevin is insufferable to be around and Neil rightfully he hates him for it. He's jealous of how Kevin seemingly gets to have so much (a life, a future, a home, protection, an identity) when he and Neil alike started from the same place, fearing their respective ties to the mafia. He understands Kevin more than anyone else on the team and needs him to make it and be free and is willing to risk it all for it. He has faith in Kevin who loves the sport so so much, craves his approval and knows that if Kevin can believe in Him, surely he can be Something. A lot of the plot moves forward because Neil picks fights where no rational person would, but the key behind is that he does it for Kevin (and/or the team). I just like them...

AFTG is an unserious story, but I wouldn't say it revels in characters suffering for the sake of it. It's driven by love and faith in other people and characters can be uglier for it...but it can save them nonetheless. Because of it, I can excuse some of AFTG's more egregious unrealistic moments.

good things
don't last

The sauce is there okay!!! It's what makes this such a fast read. The set-ups are there...the intrigue is there...I'd go as far to say it's the first half of the series that's fun as hell. In the second half...my excitement waned. I got through it with a grimace on my face. Few miscellaneous reasons for this!

There is a shift in Neil once he decides to accept that he's really running with this team as far as he can and if he dies by the end of the year? So be it. He'll die (with the hopes that he can take down his father and the Moriyamas as much as he can). I do like this conviction on Neil's part. I like what it does for his character (loveee borrowed time. loveee premature grief. so on and so forth.)...just...not what it necessarily turns his character into?

One of the formulas the plot utilizes is Neil pisses off the Ravens/Moriyamas in public -> retaliation against team and team gets hurt. The first couple of times Neil does this, Neil does it more so in defense of Kevin/the rest of the Foxes who are being disparaged and disrespected. Especially with regards to Kevin, it is via this fight that Neil is able to fight for himself (because Neil equates the Moriyamas and his mafia father and the fear/control they push on them). Neil actually feels pretty complicated about the retaliation. There is guilt because there is the need to protect his friends, but the reason he is fighting this fight to begin with is also for the sake of his friends. There aren't any easy answers. Neil can't have it all...but he's trying anyways. There's suspense in knowing it'll all give in at some point. When Neil accepts that he's going to die...he doesn't hold back anymore. This formula doesn't get executed in a way I like because it feels like Neil is doing this more for himself than for his friends. So...when that retaliation inevitability occurs...I'm more inclined to blame Neil for it. It doesn't make sense for his character if one of his goals is also to protect his team. Neil becomes rash in a way that doesn't work for me.

This segues into my issues with Kevin. Kevin knows what the Ravens and Moriyamas are like and he spends much of the series being rightfully afraid of them. Kevin is an fascinating assortment of traits. He has a one track mind, is unforgiving, is someone people put on a pedestal, is a person who...when he believes in someone...he Believes in them, tactless when he needs to be otherwise, tact-ful when it's too late, undeniably selfish, but not heartless either. Well, except when he is heartless. He's kind of a princess to me and I wish his fear, trauma and forward progress were developed and respected more. Unfortunately, where Neil seems to be "over" his fear...Kevin is understandably not, but because Neil is our main character, Kevin is truly not painted favorably. He takes such such a passive role which is so strange considering he's the trigger for story's core conflict. He's treated unfairly on multiple levels. Take for example, when the the Ravens threaten Neil to practice with them over break or Andrew/the team would suffer and Neil goes, telling only Kevin. The Foxes find out and are mad at Kevin which makes sense, but also like...can you really blame Kevin all that much? It was Neil's decision...The Foxes don't have a lot of room to defend themselves either. Or when the Foxes find out about Neil's full identity which Kevin kept a secret because Neil asked him to and they beat him up for it...again what was Kevin supposed to do...or when they find out the Foxes' coach is actually Kevin's biological dad, but Kevin didn't tell him and they got angry because their coach had the right to know...even though Kevin only wanted to protect their coach/he probably wasn't ready to tell this truth he himself only found out recently...or when Jean Moreau, a teammate on the Ravens that Kevin left behind, has his life at risk and they all get on his ass for Kevin not being proactive (personally found this part to be OOC for Kevin...but whatever!!) My point is that it got so, so tiring seeing Kevin being a pathetic, static punching bag that was not growing or doing anything. Besides Neil, he's one of the most important characters of the series so Kevin being done dirty does affect my enjoyment quite a bit. He's genuinely a flawed character and I would have had a blast working through that a bit more. When Kevin does come around and overcome his fear in time for the finals championships match against the Ravens...it feels random. It feels like the author missed a big opportunity to create a strong narrative :/

So I had problems with Neil. And Kevin. As for Andrew...it was fine. I just think his relationship with his Aaron and Nicky was not done too much justice for how interesting they were at the beginning. Neil's POV has never felt so limiting before. Yes, we learn of past events, but give me something that lets me peer into Aaron and Nicky's minds a bit more. This is an opportunity to Say Something thematically!!! Their reconciliation/journey to better understand Andrew and each other is necessary for the team to survive championships. How that happens? Neil pressures Aaron to do something about it, sets them up for a joint therapy session, is generally kind of asshole-ish about it all...etc. It feels like Aaron is dragging his feet (and thus this plot point) and the atmosphere among the team is sooo weird for it and it's like...why...We don't actually get to meaningfully learn much more about Andrew's lot by the way. It just made half the team and Andrew himself less interesting to me...

So...with Kevin's flop era and the Andrew's lot thing not totally being resolved...we jump right into the whole reveal of Neil's identity and Neil getting kidnapped by his father thing and their teammates defending Neil and standing by him anyways...yay. It would have a greater impact if the team vibe wasn't so weird like right before this. This team was not united enough for it ...Ultimately, I did not find the climax to be very satisfying at all as a result. Kevin and Aaron lock in after this whole fiasco just in time for their final game against the Ravens, but it's really too little too late. In terms of the actual mafia part of the plot? A little unserious, but it worked.

I wanted to reread AFTG for something stupid fun (not necessarily peak writing) that would take my mind off things and it did in fact do that. There's no way around the fact that I liked the series for its characters and I was disappointed with the follow through, but...I do think credit should be given where it's due. The sauce was there and not everyone can create a constant sit-on-the-edge-of-your-seat type of story.

the sunshine court

But that's not it!! We rejoiced!!

Read this as a quick bedtime story to get me sleepy enough before bed. Truly treating yaoi like it's fast food out here. I didn't go in expecting much, but it was actually quite good! With just 14 chapters, I feel like I was able to get true glimpse at the heaviness of a mid-life crisis and how to carry on forward.

Old Fashioned Cupcake follows 39 year old office worker Nozue as he realizes that despite his age, he doesn't have much to show for it other than a melancholy routine of working and sleeping. His younger-than-him-by-a-decade subordinate at work, Togawa, decides to help him out by inviting Nozue to a breadth of new experiences perhaps more commonly associated with a younger troupe of people. As romance blooms between the two of them, Nozue confronts what it means to be old and his true self (particularly) in a society that isn't kind to people like him.

I'm only 21 and while I hardly think adulthood is a glamorous thing (I believe quite the opposite actually), I think something I do take for granted is the sheer forward momentum of youth. I look forward to the stability adulthood might offer, because I know there are consequences for messing up now and failing to wrangle life's unpredictability. Nozue is a rational person with a good job that he's skilled at, but he bends underneath the weight of his own experience and compulsion to protect the stability he has now. Because that's all he can say he has. His fear has only grown. Feeling more alive is an active effort made on his part (with Togawa's encouragement). It's something he had to cultivate by doing new things, creating variety in his life and actually taking stock of his hobbies and interests. It entails Nozue legitimately learning to be himself.

Maybe this happens over & over again, both consciously and subconsciously, but it seems like your sense of self can be worn down with age, especially in the name of doing the correct, 'adult' thing. "Being yourself" isn't the lesson commonly associated with 40 year olds that's for sure. I'm able to entertain that there is a rich, transformative life to lead even past age 30, but it took some time to get to this point. Stories like these did and do a lot for me. The decisions you take for your true self and to preserve often don't mesh well with what's socially acceptable, but that doesn't mean there isn't room for you to go forward anyways.






Some other things I liked: that Nozue coming into himself also meant accepting the less savory truths (he is a worrier, but it's something to acknowledge head on as a part of himself...it's not necessarily a bad thing either!), Nozue unintentionally touching a lot of people's hearts in the past and having his own words repeated back to him, the panelling was just REALLY excellent overall etc. I'm not a huge, huge fan of age gap romances, but I actually think it served the story's themes and Nozue's conflict/growth well. I'm glad I read this :>

What it means to truly act your age, I think...is to know your real self and be it.

Read as a bedtime yuri (up till chapter 41)...I was kinda really into it LOL. The premise of the story: our main character Jiho accidentally sees her best friend Wonhee's boobs and can't stop thinking about them. After she confesses as much, Wonhee actually lets her see and touch them much to Jiho's surprise. Of course, things grow more complicated once we take into account Wonhee's unspoken feelings and Jiho reuniting and sparking something with her crush Yeonwoo.

I don't know how exactlyyy to articulate why I liked it as much as I did. It's about the vibes...it's yuri...trust me bro. That being said, I've been told my standards drop way lower for yuri. which! no comment! I will do my best proceed with this review anyways.

Sooo to preface I like love triangles (specific to yuri mostly) and I like friends with benefits as a trope. I enjoyed Jiho as a character who is a bit of a clown, spontaneous, likes to socialize, kind of openly gay (and therefore not displaying traditional feminine ideals), unabashedly herself, but also very sharp, surprisingly academic, isn't afraid to pursue what she wants, but is cognizant of the dynamics between her and other people. She doesn't exactly hide her feelings per se, but she doesn't keep her heart on her sleeve. Put more simply, I enjoy this character archetype of an extroverted person you might find yourself inclined to dismiss due to their perceived naivety or foolishness, but the truth is they have an uncanny ability to read people and their way of navigating life is a deliberate choice. A bit like the older Kwon brother from Unlucky Mansion. The distance (and closeness) Jiho chooses to have with other people is intriguing.

Wonhee is the "straight" girl of the duo, though to be honest that was news to me given how she readily offered up her boobs to Jiho. I like them as best friends who spend a lot of their time with each other, but as you read further, the distance between them is apparent. The relationship they have is compelling to me. They initially meet because Wonhee is having problems with her boyfriend (namely that he wants to go further sexually and she does not) and Jiho just happens to be there multiple times. Jiho helps her out and they become closer. Boyfriend eventually leaves the picture. I liked the way Wonhee's character was constructed as the "straight" girl. Her character feels pretty quiet to me. She doesn't have that many friends, her inner thoughts are often kept to herself and not to mention, she doesn't always get the most screen time. Her growth and the particular perspectives she holds aren't immediately obvious to the characters around her. Wonhee doesn't come off as helpless. (Which for the record, I don't think it'd be a bad thing if she did. There is a time and place for female characters who struggle in that way against the men in their lives. There are narratives worth exploring there. I personally think the vibe/direction Wonhee was taken in is not that and it's decidedly more suited to the story because of it.) Wonhee is simply feeling out the limitations she is coming across as a woman pursuing romance and she is slowly taking her time to figure herself out. She's very receptive to Jiho's obviously not straight sexuality. She knows Jiho has some rumors floating around her, but she really sees and values parts of Jiho that others don't and goes out of her way to defend her. Wonhee is a methodical sort of person. She's moving forward in terms of understanding her sexuality and you can almost see the gears turn in her head. She is taking her time, but I don't think it's right to call her passive either.

A lot of the distance Jiho puts between her and Wonhee is informed by her own trauma inflicted by straight girls who found out about her sexuality. Jiho cares about Wonhee, but also understands that she's also straight (of course, we know otherwise). Maybe I haven't read enough yuri, but this plot beat felt refreshing. A huge reason why Jiho has relations with Yeonwoo at all is because, although it's also still a friends-with-benefits situation, they both understand that they are both gay and there are consequences for it due to a world rife with homophobia. Jiho and Yeonwoo's relations are fine, but it's clear that both of them are bringing their unresolved trauma to the table. They're trying to move on, but they're not growing as people. Wonhee's jealousy is apparent, but also in a quieter sense. She likes Jiho more than as a friend. Jiho is an important part of her journey towards figuring out her sexuality. Having a gay person by your side changes her view of the world up until this point. We can sympathize with her, but Jiho is justified in her decision to be careful. Especially because Jiho is also on the brink romantically with Wonhee too. That's where Jiho occasionally being allowed to touch/feel/taste Wonhee's boobs comes in. Half the time it's Wonhee who offers first because She wants to feel close to Jiho. It comes with the tension of their closeness and distance.

Maybe my opinions on the story are subject to change. A lot can still happen moving forward. But for now, I will appreciate that within these 41 or so chapters, I acknowledge what the story did. I think I'll be checking out the creator's other works! (Also forgot to mention it before, but the side couple was also really cute!)

Didn't know much about Frieren going in, but it was a generally anticipated seasonal anime for many so I tuned in. The four episode debut really blew me away! The set-up of the main party of heroes adventure of defeating the demon king already being done and we get to see what comes after is a really lovely one. The forward march of time in the story (communicated with the "x years after Himmel the Hero's death" narration format) never stops, but it's presented with a kind of gentle inevitability I think. (There's a good sense of the ebb and flow of time and knowing when to let thing go.) I really liked that Frieren loses track of time and then checks on her friends once more as they're older and closer to death. It's a matter that Frieren is used to, being an elf with a longer lifespan. When she meets Himmel again and then later when he dies, the sadness she experiences isn't a dramatic, angst-ful thing like I initially expected. I found this to be a welcome change after Marcille's arc in Dungeon Meshi being the opposite lol! Nonetheless, the sadness is still there in Frieren wishing she got to know Himmel more. The party's adventure was only a mere ten years out of Frieren's much longer lifespan and Frieren herself isn't sure if it actually means much. The following story is evidence of otherwise: that she changed as a person in that short time span and the bonds and memories she made live on as she walks a new chapter of her life, this time embracing her capabilities of growing.

I like the story's core themes about treasuring short-lived moments and wanting to be remembered and making an effort to understand the people you care about etc. I really do have to commend the story for its premise once again, because it's lovely and it just feels right that a popular title should tap into this idea. I adore how Frieren's new part features her old friends' students, Fern and Stark. What they bring in relation to Frieren's prior adventure is good! They get to be their own characters rather than a stand-in for Frieren's old party. I like themes surrounding the nature of time and the changes it brings like Frieren not looking down on humans abilities compared to her own or the demon's, how what we know to be factual and true can change drastically etc. I so, so very much liked it...in the beginning..ish. I wanted Frieren to be a favorite so bad...but there are several reasons why it didn't and why I honestly might not continue...

This is subjective obviously, but Frieren is simply a seasonal anime that is a cut above the rest. It lacks an immediate charm and it makes it as far as it does with good writing/concepts, but's its not enough. To clarify, I'm not saying there's no charming characters at all. On the contrary, I found Frieren's old part, Fern and Stark to be pretty charming! But Fern and Stark lose a lot of their charm for me later on and the characters introduced later on take a bit too long to become charming. "Charm" is such a subjective thing so you're just going to have to take it as it is, but I guess I'm particularly thinking about how even the most minor of side characters in Haikyuu are silly and cute right away and you want to learn more about them. I just don't feel that way with many of the characters in Frieren which is not really great for a slice-of-life story I'm afraid. Like truly shout-out to the later characters like Ubel, Land, Wirbel etc. but I was surprised they grew on me frankly! Especially since there were other side characters that did not. Regarding Fern and Stark...let me just preface that Fern was one of my favorites immediately. I like that she's a serious female character who actually gets to be taken seriously, but it's not like she doesn't have her quirks. Stark is more the pushover type and Fern judges him a lot more, but for the most part they get along sweetly in a way that doesn't feel disrespectful to Fern. Until...they start getting into the same immature type of squabbles where it feels like Fern, as the serious female character, is being difficult just for the sake of being difficult. It's a real pet peeve of mine to see and I'm afraid Fern's character really was just...kind of ruined for me in these moments. Initially, I wouldn't have minded a romance between the two as long as it was super slow burn, but that's not the case either. The hints of their romance is very...wow there's a young boy...and a young girl...you know what that means! Which like. no thanks. One of the side characters that really made Stark and especially Fern worse was Stark...fuck that guy! I don't care for how Fern has to be pitted as the immature one here...I feel like there is better and more interesting ways to showcase Fern and Stark's relationship and their growth!

On a final note about the characters...I'm not sure I trust the creator with Frieren and Himmel either. I guess I have a specific interpretation of them, but sue me. To me, I think Himmel does truly love Frieren, but I truly prefer if it's not in the traditional romantic sense. Himmel is interested in Frieren as a person and wants to challenge her worldviews, but he's completely fine with his romantic feelings being one-sided. I don't think he himself wants to initiate anything and I don't think his feelings towards Frieren are Only romantic. Himmel is a precious person to Frieren and I don't think it's wrong to say Frieren loves him too, but it's definitely not romantic lol. I just don't care for forcing the love characters have for each other into a narrow view of what love has to look like. Sometimes love is best subtle, at a distance, not quite requited, not solely in the form of romantic love etc. etc. Maybe I just saw a few too many Frieren x Himmel ship posts...cause why are you drawing them as a nuclear family with kids lmao. Anyways, what we see here is the story once again straying too close to a pet peeve of mine (if it happened with Fern and Stark this soon...I truly can't bring myself to place trust here either).

The final point I wanted to mention was about the demons as a running plot. I don't like it! The story tries to tell us that the demons are merely animals that mimic human language or whatever and they lack human emotion, but you can't show me demons expressing some pretty abstract, high-level thinking or emotions like anger/fear/etc. and expect me to buy that. It really just feels like a convenient evil fantasy race and I'm tired of it. At times, it feels like the story is trying to challenge Frieren's perceptions of the demons, but...nope. Nothing substantially has changed up as of 130 chapters. So, I'm just a bit confused what direction the story is going with the demons. I don't think having an opposing force the main cast has to fight against is inherently bad. It's a big part of the story's worldbuilding. It's a means through which we can explore some of those themes about time and change. I just truly don't see why the demons couldn't be actual animals (like an invasive species) or like...undead, vengeful spirits or something. Anything other than the demons which don't make sense as they are. I might say that even as a running plot, the demons are ignorable and you can still enjoy everything else, but Frieren is lacking on the slice-of-life side as well.

TLDR: Frieren's potential is so real and I can understand the popularity it garners. It just hits a few too many pet peeves of mine! The anime production quality and experience was real nice at least?

Watched this movie for class! I love my wlw relationships, but I also like them best when they don't feature two white people/a person of color paired with a white person so I've had my eye on Saving Face. Before I get into my thoughts into the film: a few tangents incoming.

1] I think it's pretty amazing this film got made at all. Alice Wu (the director) spent her twenties working in tech (at Microsoft CD-ROM's entertainment department) in the nineties and then her thirties doing writing gigs, slowly breaking into tv and the film industry. The film draws on her own unideal experiences coming out to her family as a Chinese woman. Saving Face was actually originally supposed to be a novel, but as Wu took a screenwriting class at the University of Washington, it ended up becoming a screenplay she wrote in three days. The script won a contest held by the Coalition of Asian Pacifics in Entertainment in 2002, giving her a chance to actually make this film. The process was ever-grueling as you can imagine with the pressures to whitewash the story and choose more famous actors, but Wu did her best to keep her vision. In the end, the film was successful. I find Wu's personal story from here on pretty interesting. When the focus turned to Wu creating her next work, the exhaustion from trying to defend her queer stories of color got to her. Wu's mother and her reconciled before Saving Face was released, so when Wu's mother became sick, it wasn't a hard decision to leave the industry to take care of her. Life happened and then years later Wu found her experience gave her more to write about. Thus, the release of The Half of It, sixteen years later (source: indiewire). I suppose I like noting down the nonlinear journeys people have.

2] I think how representation is wielded in the US is an interesting thing. I just wouldn't have expected a film like this to be released in 2004. The fanfare certain films/tv got for the strides it's making in terms of representation in the past five? six? seven? years gave me the perception that casting and the type of stories that came to screens really must not have been all that inclusive before. I don't think that's not true, but this film served as a reminder that I really do need to watch more older movies. People of marginalized demographics were making art like this. Celebrating representation (and just to be clear, I'm more so talking about this from industry people with varying levels of power as opposed to your average viewer at home) is done so under the guise like it is a forward and unprecedented progress. And now I just wonder if that's really the case. Representation is good, but hardly not the end-all be-all when job opportunities for marginalized groups behind the screen is sorely lacking and to have that fact not acknowledged just makes setting representation as a benchmark a performative thing. But even representation on screen (of course, depending on the demographic) appears to be regressing. For example: You see the backlash an actresses of color face when they play a live-action disney princess (whose love interest is always played by a white person) and then almost wonder how Cinderella (1997) with a Black Cinderella and Filipino prince charming was able to happen. This isn't totally unexpected. The rollback of minority rights as fascism takes hold (and it has already very much taken hold) will of course mean less willingness to support representation of minority peoples on screen. I guess. It's just weird to see when progress seemed so real for a moment. It's the complacency of that mentality itself has allowed fascism to flourish though, so I think it's worth acknowledging and dwelling in it.

Tangents: over. Maybe they're not all that worth including, but they were a part of my experience watching the film. Context often makes things richer. Anyways! To the film itself! Saving Face follows Wil, a closeted lesbian on track to becoming a successful surgeon, and her widowed mother, Hwei-Lan. Initially, the pair are often found at community buffet dinners where Hwei-Lan continuously sets up her daughter with young Chinese men with the hope that she will get married and start a family. Wil expresses disinterest but attempts to placate her mother’s efforts anyway. The story takes a turn when Wil discovers her mother in her own home, kicked out by Wil's grandparents for being pregnant but refusing to disclose who the father is. While Hwei-Lan endures being shunned by the local Chinese community, Wil navigates her romantic relationship with a woman in secret. In a film that highlights the Chinese community and how it functions for those who meet social expectations and those who don’t, Saving Face tells us how there is an instinctual struggle to maintain your reputation, but to be your true self anyways can be done with the strength derived from others also being themselves in a society that doesn’t accept them. It's a core message I found appealing precisely because it relies on this not just being Wil's story, but also her mother's.

The pressure Hwei-Lan and others place on Wil to get married quickly is standard, but the film's decision to turn this on its head and pit Hwei-Lan under this spotlight to do the same because of her pregnancy is one I really liked. Perhaps I'm picky about mother/daughter conflicts spurred on by cultural/generational differences, but I'm really wary of when it can feel unequal? Hwei-Lan might have already gone through many of life's checkpoints, but the rejection she received from Wil's grandfather (her father) when he finds out she's pregnant is stark and hard to watch. Her authority (as Wil's mother at least) seems little in the face of weighty social expectations she, too, has to meet. As Wil and her mother live together, Wil pursues a relationship with Vivian, another Chinese woman, but is unable to truly commit and go public. During this time, Hwei-Lan steadfastly refuses to disclose who the father is. It becomes abundantly clear that both mother and daughter already face backlash for not conforming to social expectations (Wil is unmarried/doesn't present femininely enough, her mother is pregant and unmarried), they still are trying to maintain their reputation/save face for the aspects of themselves that they can (Wil doesn't want to come out, her mother is keeping the father's identity a secret). It doesn't matter that Hwei-Lan raised and supported a Wil who is financially successful and meets the ideal of being a surgeon. Maintaining one's reputation is a process that reaches every aspect of oneself across a lifetime. Even if you meet every expectation, you are answerable for your family etc. Saving face is itself a dynamic mentality/lifestyle that people live by. There's always some source of anxiety and it is exhausting. It is punctuated with loss (we see this in Wil's relationship with Vivian being jeopardized). I appreciated the film's clarity about this.

As expected, Hwei-Lan doesn't approve of her daughter's queerness even though if anyone is in a position to understand her daughter, it's her. In a film where the daughter's queerness is an issue, but the mother/daughter relationship is supposed to end happily...how you go about the mother's change needs to be done carefully I think. Parents can and do change their minds about their homophobia, but it's hardly an easy thing especially when the run time of a movie is not that long. This film managed to pull it off in a way I liked, however. When Wil comes out, Hwei-Lan sees herself as a failure of a mother for it, not understanding why Wil would willingly buy into a life of hardship, a point that is able to resonate with us a little bit more as we see her stigmatized by her own community. It's an important distinction from a situation where Hwei-Lan simply finds queerness to be disgusting, a stance harder to come back from so quickly. Hwei-Lan knows of her own suffering and knows at least some of the ways that Wil will suffer if she came out publicly, but she can't accept either of their pain. It's noticeably after this moment that Hwei-Lan starts meeting suitors for marriage. The final destination of both mother and daughter publicly embracing themselves only happens when Hwei-Lan's secret lover steps up and confesses his love for Hwei-Lan regardless of backlash. It empowers Wil to do the same and then, finally her mother. I really, really liked this. Empathy alone doesn't get mother and daughter where they deserve to be. I think there's euphoria to be felt when you watch someone be themselves unabashedly and it can be the strength that pushes you to do the same. The joy from no longer repressing yourself and companionship felt with other people who are also overlooked by society is now accessible. You just needed to see someone take that step first. It's a message I find to be true when repression is posited as the most reasonable and only option there is!

The film is ultimately a light one, but I look back on it fondly :>

Yuri can save us !!!

Really glad I made the decision to watch the drama. The manga looks lovely (and I plan to read new chapters/volumes as they come out from now on), but the drama was just so wonderfully adapted and executed. Watching it feels like a warm hug or a proper meal. The casting was really spot on. Even beforehand, I remember being happy they got someone who actually looks like Kasuga to play her.

She Loves to Cook, She Loves to Eat is a simple slice of life yuri about Nomoto who loves to cook large portions, but can't eat it all. Enter: Kasuga, her neighbor who eats well. Love ensues. I cannot convey this enough, but it's such a healing watch. I find that not all slice of life stories are made the same. Despite the whole genre itself being known for its slow and steady pacing, I think that some stories are more easily digestible than others. This is one of them! But what I really adore about it is that as you watch, you get the sense that a lot of thoughtfulness was put behind the characters and story beats. The way the story depicts and acknowledges the patriarchy, homophobia, constrictive societal rules and norms etc... it's in the little, matter-of-fact manifestations of these things that are simply are a part of character's lived experiences. These experiences are integral to why and how the characters carry themselves the way they do. It was true to real life, but it didn't feel overbearing. The characters (who are all fairly level-headed adults) have walked and continue to walk towards their true selves and the lives they want to read. It's an endearing hopeful thing to watch them do so in a world like this.

I loved Kasuga and Nomoto a whole lot...there's something very gratifying about seeing adult women deeply value and care about other women and really just *see* the other in their full personhood. So much so that when it comes to navigating their relationship with the other person, they can't help but be frank and true. The side characters were also a delightful surprise! I really think my himejoshi Yako and the sweetest ever Nagumo brought a lot to the show.

I look forward to the story's future!

I watched this movie for the first time on a whim a few weeks ago and I rewatched it because I needed to do a film review for class. It's a very lovely thing! Short Vacation follows four middle school girls tasked with photographing the end of the world. They decide to take a short trip to the end of a train station line.

It's a simple storyline, but it was so pleasant how everything was presented without fanfare. It's taking a peak into their lives, but it hardly felt exclusionary. The girls' demeanors and little idiosyncrasies really warmed my heart and made me feel like I was in middle school again. My favorite bits happen later on where we see them have to deal with their little fieldtrip going awry. And maybe this is just me, but I think it's an interesting feeling to play with...going out with friends and you're not having a bad time, but things didn't go as planned. There's an undercurrent of group dynamics, different thoughts in the back of different minds because no one handles these type of things the same way, the ability to be light even now etc. It's a revealing type of experience. All this is even more true because these are girls who were in elementary school just a year ago. The way they process new experiences & how they interpret "the end" during a period of their life where there are new things expected of them everyday is fascinating to me.

In an interview, the directors Kwon Min-pyo and Seo Han-sol talk about how they specifically wanted this story to be about young girls. Since there are fewer places made available for young girls to truly just...be? play? They thought their approach to the given prompt would be different. This resonated with me a bit. My thoughts on girlhood aside (a part of me kind of can't take it seriously anymore because of the whole 'i'm just a girl'/'girl math'/'divine feminine'/universal girlhood phenomenon I see. the whiteness, bioessentialist, transmisognystic etc. nature of it pisses me off.), I really think the childhood of young girls (and the friendship!!!) is a precious thing. It's wild to me that there are people who feel bad when they have daughters.

Anyways! I liked the movie a lot! The actresses were given a lot of free reign to improvise so the experience so the entire experience comes out to feel very, very fresh.

This drama aired a few years ago and I remember a good amount of people being into it. A lot of people really liked it, but my friend had conflicting opinions, though she gave the disclaimer that I might think differently. The premise of a good student paired with a bad student combined with the mixed reception intrigued me so I did plan on watching it eventually and the stars happened to align now.

A very brief and choppy synopsis: A documentary is filmed where a good student and bad student in high school spend time together. After the filming ends, they begin a relationship which lasts for about five years, but ends in a difficult break-up. Some time passes and their old documentary resurfaces in popularity. Our two main leads suddenly find themselves shooting a ten-years-later documentary (somewhat) against their will.

The first episode was rough. I-don't-know-if-I-can-watch-this rough. All the characters came off as the type of annoying that could only get more annoying. The second episode was actually pretty decent though so I continued it. Our Beloved Summer is very much an exes getting back together story and I honestly thought it was pretty good for the first 5? 6? 7? episodes (minus the pilot ofc). The circumstances/positions of the leads (Yeon-su = FL; Ung = ML;) lended itself to some interesting concepts I think...I liked Yeon-su putting up a front because she's poor and it's a way for her to ensure she doesn't get taken advantage of. I liked Ung as a person who truly does not want to do much and the people around him don't understand. I liked Yeon-su and Ji-ung being bothered by Ung's privilege that he doesn't obviously realize he has. I liked Yeon-su being ambitious as a student, but her facing the limits of how ambitious she can be as an adult. I liked the dissonance Yeon-su feels when she sees Ung is successful as an adult (even though he was a bad student). I liked that Ung isn't characterized as someone who is good with people - he is passive when people are unfair to him. I liked that Ung was loved, but he was also treated like the bad student among his more responsible peers.

Stories about exes and second chances can be a bit tricky, especially if it's a straight romance, because it matters that much more that the characters feel like they're on equal footing. I don't like it when the girl is difficult Just Cause and she has to come around to the guy. The dynamic between the two was made okay because there were concepts behind them that gave them substance. The two leads are already toeing the line being an exes-to-lovers story, but they fell juuuust on the right side because of it. I'm saying this cause as I'm writing about their dynamic, I realize it might not sound all that appealing even if I did enjoy it lol.

I liked their dynamic when they were dating in high school...the tension of the other person being someone who could leave if there was no reason to stay, Ung working to stay by her side whether it's him studying for a college entrance exam or adjusting to Yeon-su's speed, Yeon-su pestering him with what-if questions about them breaking up, Ung not quite saying the affirming words Yeon-su wanted to hear, Ung navigating Yeon-su's contradictions (she is self-centered, unwilling to help others, lacks social skills and is hardly a romantic while simultaneously showing a kinder side to Ung, standing up for him and bringing her own romance to the table) them still very much having the same vibe of banter pre-relationship,them as couple going through quick break-ups & make-ups etc.

On some level, I think the show got the exes part right too. The meat of it all...questioning why the other person got over the relationship sooner than you did, not wanting to acknowledge the real, sweeter moments they once had together, cataloguing the ways the other person has changed & perhaps reveling in the ways they did not, confronting the parts they didn't miss, coming to face the unmistakable loneliness they both feel, doing things they purposely know the other dislikes because they have that freedom now, wanting to be friends, not wanting to be friends etc. etc. A lot of the classic Exes things you'd want in a story like this.

Yeon-su and Ung's relationship is punctuated with all these little aspects and it's fun! Which is why it's kind of a shame that the show gets sooooooo fucking booooring. I don't know why, but I was under the impression things actually happened? Nothing dramatic did...after episode 8 or I stopped watching it on Netflix because 1.5x speed was not cutting it. Yeon-su and Ung go through the motions of getting together and yeah...some of the main parts of their character conflicts were touched on...but. it was all very surface level. There were so many angles and parts to work with that I wish they would have committed to. The main couple definitely got together too soon.



Another big part of this was the under-utilization of the side characters for anything interesting. NJ is an idol who pursues Ung and she's there to inspire jealousy in Yeon-su, but overall...they really were not doing a whole lot with her character! Her life is hard and she knows this and she busies herself with men who aren't interested in her. She likes Ung for his art, but then for his comforting words. Of course, nothing actually happens and she accepts Ung as a friend. It's just like. Fine. This is fine. It could have gone in a far more annoying direction. It's just...so boring. We never actually explore her character in that much depth or commit to the parallels between her and Ung/Ji-ung. I want a show to say something!!! I personally thought NJ was entertaining enough to warrant something greater.

Ung's manager bestie and Yeon-su's restaurant bestie are silly and I'm fine with how they are. My other main criticisms lie with Ung's childhood friend, Ji-ung, who witness to Ung and Yeon-su's relationship in their entirety and is also the one filming their ten-years-later documentary. It's very obvious from the moment he is introduced that he likes Yeon-su and has always liked her. It's part of his reason for taking the initiative to make this sequel documentary happen at all. The masochism here is staggering, really. I cannot express how boring this man is. This plotline is boring and it is given entirely too much screentime (especially because he never actually makes a move on Yeon-su!). Woe is you... the guy crushing on his friend's girlfriend-then-ex. Go girl give us nothing. It's just a bit of a shame since Ji-ung could have been a character I really liked.



I enjoy Ji-ung's silent-suffering, sarcastic, observant demeanor. A lot of my favorite characters are this vibe. His similarities to Yeon-su and tension with Ung and his privilege deserved more. I would have rather seen him be a meddler-type character like Jaehyeon from Seasons of Blossom (webtoon). Someone who knows what Ung and Yeon-su are like from the sidelines and rather than Ji-ung liking Yeon-su, Ji-ung just deeply cares about both of them as friends. He wants to play fixer basically. Why is that? Cue his fraught relationship with his mother. Ji-ung desires to be known and he can’t bear to see Ung and Yeon-su not work out when they’ve already done the impossible part (know the other person). Ji-ung being in charge of this documentary now becomes a study in human relationships. That’s what it would be like if the show was catered to me at least.

I’m pretty used to having mixed opinions on kdramas so this isn’t a surprise to me. Show was alright. It's another take on exes and second chances that gave me a greater appreciation for the concept (it made me appreciate When the Day Comes and Turn To Me Mukai-kun more). I forgot to mention it before but the casting was really great.

(I forgot to mention it before, but if you want a way better rendition of Ji-ung and his mom's type of relationship watch Life's Punchline.)

Trillion Game!!! I had a blast with this one.

Trillion Game follows Haru, who possesses excellent communication skills, but limited IT skills, and Gaku, who has excellent IT skills, but communicates rather poorly. The two reunite after finding out they've both applied to the nation's largest IT company, Dragon Bank. Haru gets in. Gaku doesn't. To his surprise, however, Haru turns down the job in order to start his own company with Gaku. The goal? Earn a trillion dollars (and take over Dragon Bank along the way).

This is a show best watched unseriously and with your suspension of disbelief at close hand. I'm sure there's plenty of fictional business stories out there that begin with two friends working together, reaching higher and higher levels of success, finding that the tension between each other is also growing and perhaps finally falling out. Some of the early scenes of Trillion Game feature a successful Gaku, president of their company (also named Trillion Game), handling all aspects of company business while reminiscing on a Haru who seems to be out of the picture. So I thought this was going to be another one of those stories where friendship and business conflict and it doesn't end well.

For the record, I haven't actually read/watched a story like that myself. Maybe the The Social Network is like this! No clue! Also, I didn't know this while watching, but this is just a season and not the full story (Trillion Game is adapted from a manga that is currently releasing). So for the record, maybe Trillion Game is going down this road as well. But, for this season at least, I was pleasantly surprised to see it didn't quite go like how I expected which is why I liked it so much.

The humor and commitment to the ridiculousness of growing a company rapidly was really entertaining. Just real unserious, playful stuff. Like when they hired some still-a-college-senior girl randomly and said yes. You are on our executive board now. Congrats! (We love you Rinrin). Every episode was essentially them diving into a new industry and bullshitting their way through (hence, why suspension of disbelief is key here lol). My personal favorite instance of this is during episode 3 when Haru tries to break his way into the host club industry to help sell their fake AI flower selling app.

What made Trillion Game as enjoyable as it was was the characters and the dynamics with each other. Haru is the Charming and Social and Cunning one, but his care and gratitude for Gaku and Rinrin was so sweet. He'd always pull up with something unexpected and Gaku and Rinrin would gawk at him, but they'd go along with his insanery because there was a real trust there. They all were having fun! I really thought Haru would be more of a backstabber character, pushing the limits of Rinrin and particularly Gaku's goodwill and morals. That tension is absolutely there, but I was able to enjoy it because Haru always did take their wishes seriously. Haru is interesting to me because he's clearly not just motivated by profits here. If Haru did care about Gaku and the rest of their company solely in a cold, profit-calculating way, I think I'd be a lot more bored. The actual direction is a lot more fun and lighthearted.

Now is where I finally get to talk about my wife Kirika. Kirika (or "Princess Kiri") is the daughter of Dragon Bank's chairman who takes a lead role in running different sectors of the company herself. She is. SO pretty. My heart fluttered every time she was on screen. She is unforgiving and will get what she wants and she is also the first person Haru and Gaku go to to ask for an investment in their company. The games played between Kirika and Haru/Gaku are such a highlight for me. The on-screen chemistry is there! Kirika wants to crush them and is having the time of her life slowly and suddenly making her moves against them. It's so funny because there several times where Haru and Gaku are in trouble and she just helps them even if she's their opponent. Anything to keep the game fun. And she sure is having fun!! She's just sooo cute and she finds them cute too.




The three of them had delectable toxic polycule vibes TO ME!! I'll figure out how videos work in html later but for now here is a link of a good Kirika and Haru fancam, which also just showcases Kirika's banger fits.

It was a fun and silly show overall! I admit it can be a bit hard to suspend your disbelief towards the end or at least keep a straight face about it, but it's a solid watch with a neat ending.